Pound of My Flesh

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Concerts…

I’m listening to Rob Zombie at the moment & it occurred to me how many artists i just won’t be able to see live. i grew up loving grunge, i would have loved to see lalapalooza in it’s prime years; jane’s addiction, pearl jam, smashing pumpkins, etc & more for $20? that’s fucking insane by today’s standards.

The worst thing about experience is also the lack there of, in meaning, i won’t be able to catch manson when he was at his most satanic, or eddie vedder before he became incoherent, plenty of the punk bands i grew up moshing to are dads & there’s a weird juxtaposition about them saying “fuck authority”… 

& while i keep chasing the indie kids to see what’s new & what’s cool, i feel myself fading away each year, further away from the front of the stage, further from the pit & noise.

how long can i keep this up?

Horror movies

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So it’s halloween month, the time to get your creep on, it’s always been one of my favorite holidays because i like the sinister (left handed) feel behind it. If you do some background history on autumn you’ll find that in many cultures, Fall was a mark of darkness, a time when harvest was over, when night would come sooner, & that door between the spirit world & living world was thinner.

growing up with my bigger brother & sister it was easy to get into horror movies, they were older & i wanted to be one of the big kids. I would have the worst nightmares & for the life of me i don’t know why i liked it so much.

i look back now & i think it’s funny, my grandpa, who was a conductor would tell me stories about the devil’s treasure & the weeping woman, my uncle who also worked for the train station also saw ghosts… i always had this deep desire to feel the spirit world.

in my teens i read books about ghosts & aliens, i tried to read everything i could get my hands on on the occult & supernatural.

i explain this, because it surprises me that other ppl don’t like horror movies.

there’s always been a weird comfort i get from watching them, the suspense, the creepy feeling coming over me; watching the glowing screen. it’s comforting to know that the story unfolding in front of me isn’t real, or at the very least; it isn’t happening to me. it’s comforting to know that in my darkest imagination i can open my eyes & what ever nightmare i see, my life will never be as scary.

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